Question:
Hi Mr. Jim. My husband retired from army after 20 yrs service and we have been married 28 yrs. He also has PTSD Whenever he has nightmares, his personality changes and he is very roller coaster in emotions. We gave him space and then he said I wasn't there for him. Very hard situations we all had to go through and now he is asking for a divorce again. Six years ago, he was all negative about marriage and blamed me because he was not happy and then found out he was talking with one person at work day and night. It seems clear that he had an affair but he denied it. I didn't think this time he has someone else, but his behavior reminds me of the time from before. I try to understand and be calm for him but it's very hard that I have to go thru this depression and anxiety attack again due to him asking for a divorce. I am weary burnt and hurts too that I couldn't help his nightmares with PTSD, but I don't have any choice for myself. I am 55 yrs and never been worked except toward our marriage and family financial situation..We don't have credit debt only house and one of his car. My back and knees having issues and I have depression from his PTSD too. Is that possible to claim for his VA disability pay? My husband told me I can't get any from it, only from his retirement. We as family go thru same emotions like he does because of his PTSD. And any legal help for me for free because I don't work?
Jim's Reply:
When a divorce occurs the court considers all sources of income when determining alimony and child support obligations. That will include any and all retirement pay, all forms of disability pay and a whole lot more. While you can't claim a specific part of his income, all income will be reviewed by the court when they assess who owes what to who.
When the party you're divorcing tells you what you can and can't get or what you may be entitled to, you should consider that they may have a bias towards keeping you in the dark about what you are entitled to. In the end nobody says who may owe what to anyone other than the judge. The sooner you get in front of the court, the sooner you'll know if you are going to receive alimony.
- PS from StatesideLegal: You can use our "Find Legal Help" directory to look for an 'LSC provider' in your community and see if they offer free help with divorce, or request a low-cost consult with an attorney attached to an 'LRS provider' in your area. Many legal aid webites also offer self-help tools that explain the divorce process and explain your rights.